Self Help Book Club | Self help books, spiritual guides, confidence boosters, sex help, and psychology

Book: The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business [Kindle Edition]

Author: Charles Duhigg

This book is available in Kindle, Audio CD, and Hardcover so there are at least several options available to read through this book. The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business focuses on our habits used for both parts of lives in both business and our private lives.

The first three chapters of this book provided readers with the most powerful sections for them to grab hold of such as:

Chapter 1 titled "The Habit Loop" that explains all about what habit really means and what it is. The author found that habits take up approximately 40% of our daily routines. "Our brain processes routines by using a three step loop. irst, there is a cue, a trigger that tells your brain to go into automatic mode and which behavior to use. The there is the routine, which can be physical or mental or emotional. Finally, there is the reward . . ." (19)

Chapter Two titled "The Craving Brain" had a story about the product Pepsodent and shared a formula of how to create new habits for others. find a simple and obvious cue. Second, clearly define the reward." (37). The remainder of the chapter will help to fill you on the missing part of the formula. Readers will also learn how the Febreze product almost went bankrupt and how they went to earning over a billion dollars per year.

Chapter Three titled, "The Golden Rule of Habit Change" as the reader will learn which parts of the habit rules or loops to change and the best ways to go about doing this process. The author shared stories about Tony Dungee reinvented the football team Tampa Bay Buccaneers and Indianapolis Colts but instilling those same habits into those teams.

This book is perfect for anyone and everyone will gain interest into this book from business owners to smokers to coaches and more.

Reference: http://www.amazon.com/Power-Habit-What-Life-Business/dp/1400069289/ref=cm_cr_dp_orig_subj

Queen Bees and Wannabes

Rosalind Wiseman's book about teenage cliques turns out to be useful to adults, too!

You may think this is an odd choice for a Self Help Book Club website. But in my case, it really was! The hit parenting book Queen Bees and Wannabes is aimed at parents of teenage and pre-teen girls (and, by extension, at teenage and pre-teen girls themselves). But let me tell you, many (most?) of us have not significantly changed since middle school. All of the Queen Bee behavior described in this book is still applicable to adult life. And it was a real eye-opener for me.

There have been a few books written about Queen Bees as adults, but reviews of these books are mixed. I will check them out eventually, but I felt like it was best to start with the source. In reading it as a childless adult, I had to do a lot of skimming through the parts that are specific to parents. But a surprising amount of the book is perfectly applicable to people like myself.

If you have ever been nice to someone, only to have her later snap or attack you for what seems like no good reason… you might be up against a Queen Bee. Now that I know what to look for, I see them everywhere! Unlike a normal rational woman, a Queen Bee is desperately insecure - and she has to fill that hole by demanding perfect obedience from her subjects, and by attacking and humiliating anyone who she feels is out of line.

At first, I thought that Wiseman's book was thin on strategies for dealing with Queen Bees. Then I realized that this is because there really AREN'T any strategies. The only real strategy is to avoid them. And if you have no choice but to interact with one, then your only strategy is to be unfailingly polite (while also ensuring that you don't let the Queen Bee run roughshod over you).

Of course, you can't avoid what you can't identify. Being able to codify and put a name to Queen Bee Syndrome makes so many things clear. A Queen Bee often has followers, brooks no dissent, uses shame and humiliation as a weapon, and always has enemies or people who are "on the outs." In Wiseman's words, there are two kinds of popular girls: "The good kind is a girl who is genuinely liked. The mean kind is when other girls are grateful if she's nice to them and terrified when she's angry."

If you're in a relationship with the second kind, you have to get out - regardless of what kind of relationship it is. I ended two "friendships" after reading this book, and I couldn't be happier!

BOOK: Ten Days to Self Esteem

AUTHOR: David D. Burns

This book is all about dealing with one’s self when facing problems and stress in life. The author, David D. Burns, wanted to help people on how to face every difficulty that we may encounter in every day of our life. The author shared that we should spend a little more time on knowing ourselves better. Building upon our self esteem also includes on how we are patient in listening to the every people’s advice. This book will help if we will put this into seriousness and giving enough time to build a better self.

If you are experiencing heartbreak or a depression this book is perfect for you as it will definitely help you to heal and grow in confidence by completely overcoming the problem. This book will help us be a better we and have a better life overall.

This book also helps us to think in a positive way even if we are facing a big problem. This may lead us into a happier and satisfied life. To have this life, along with a good attitude you will need to be willing to put in the full effort and patience in learning a new way of living. Ten Days to Self Esteem allows us to give ourselves a chance to have a renewed life and a boosting self esteem within us.

For those who are curious about this book there is no need to think twice in buying the book. Buy it for you to learn more about the ways in making and learning more about life and how to take charge of yourself when problems and depression occur.

Reference: http://www.amazon.com/Ten-Days-Self-Esteem-David-Burns/dp/0688094554/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1330784833&sr=8-1

Nice Girls Don't Get The Corner Office

One of the most useful books I've ever read in my life!

I have so many thoughts (good thoughts) about this book, I don't even know where to start. Out of all the productivity and self-help and business/management books I have ever read (and I must confess, I have read a lot) this is the first one to go off in my head like a depth charge. It literally changed the way I look at the entire world.

Today a friend was telling me about one of his clients, who had done a lot of work for a particular distributer, and recently asked the distributor to create a dedicated website that he would use to sell their product exclusively. "Aha," I thought, "Reciprocity. Using the favors that people owe you, instead of endlessly hoarding them. Coming up with a mutually beneficial plan, and asking for what you want." It was all so clear.

The title of the book is somewhat off-putting. Lois Frankel doesn't want you to be a mean, unethical, or unusually difficult person. But she wants you to understand that you can strive to either be liked, or be successful in your career, but usually not both.

"Nice," in Frankel's definition, is what we are taught on the schoolyard. As in, "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all." To be nice is to strive to be liked. You let other people take the credit, you hold back and let them voice their opinions, you don't contradict people, and most of all, you don't advocate for yourself and your own needs. As a little girl, you have to learn to be nice. If you want to enter the grown-up world, you have to learn how to be effective.

Best of all, the book is organized into clear, concise explanations and instructions. So many self help books are open-ended and vague on the details. Frankel provides details in spades. "Here is the problem, and here are three things you can practice to cope with it." Her writing is firm, clear, and no-nonsense. (An excellent model for the person she knows you can become.)

I dare say every adult woman can benefit from this book. Some more than others. I can tell you that I will be working through it and putting its advice into practice for months - maybe years - to come. And if I have one regret about having read Nice Girls Don't Get The Corner Office, it's that I came across it so relatively late in life!

Book: The Secret of Letting Go

Author: Guy Finley

Guy Finley’s book The Secret of Letting Go is filled with many stories and examples that show his concepts on how to best let go of emotional issues and baggage that can drag people down, including their spirits, and making life a painful experience.

One of the important things Guy Finley said that we "don't need strength to let go of something. What you really need is understanding; and that's how this book will help you accomplish your lifelong dreams of being truly strong and independent." I felt this book would be a breath of fresh air for many people seeking relief from the painful journeys they are currently battling with in their life. This book contains nine chapters with section titles including, “How to Defeat What’s Defeating You, Crash Through These Self-Confining Thoughts, Snap Yourself Out of Psychic Slumber, How to Live Life on Your Own Terms, How to Break Free of Unhappy Thoughts and Feelings, Lift Yourself into a Brand-New World, How to Let Go of Helpless Feelings, Detect and Reject Psychic Intruders, How to Distinguish Invited Guests from Unwanted Intruders, Let Go of Loneliness and Discontent, Dare to Let Go and Live As You Please, Letting Go into the Power Flow, Contact with the Secret Self, Break Through to a Totally New You, Let Go and Let Higher Life Forces Succeed for You.” Finley, The Secret of Letting Go.

This book was very moving, enlightening, and lifting all at the same time. I would recommend this book to anyone who is searching for peace in their lives.

Reference: http://www.amazon.com/Secret-Letting-Go-ebook/dp/B001JEPKWY/ref=zg_bs_4736_1

Book: Just in Case – How to be Self Sufficient When the Unexpected Happens

Author: Kathy Harrison

The author talks about an experience her friends experienced with a blackout in their area that ranged from New Hampshire to Pennsylvania. The power grid was overloaded and needed to be updated however the states didn’t take care of that. The family also had a baby so it got difficult to handle disposable diapers and they ran out of fresh formula. They used their camp stove and outdoor grill to cook food that was in the freezer and fridge before they spoiled. By the time the power was restored to their area it was several weeks later. The entire family was sick and suffering from exhaustion. They learned that many people had frozen, and hundreds of thousands people had gone hungry. It took several months for the family to recover.

Reading that story in the author’s book made me think more about natural disasters that could occur in my area such as a large earthquake or flooding. Kathy Harrison provided detailed assistance in what to do and how to best prepare for anything. She shared about the importance of taking preparedness seriously and using the OAR method which consists of organizing, acquiring, and rotating supplies. I learned I need to have some additional space for supplies. She suggested that FEMA has many manuals and booklets that are helpful to consult and use. I felt this book was very helpful and much needed for families and for individuals who desire to be prepared for any natural disasters.

Reference: http://www.amazon.com/Just-Case-Self-Sufficient-Unexpected-Happens/dp/1603420355/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1328850359&sr=8-1

Book: 52 Small Changes: One Year to a Happier, Healthier You

Author: Brett Blumenthal

This book is a book of action making a person work on creating a happier life for themselves in a daily way. The author, Brett Blumenthal wanted to write book that was other than diet and exercise and provide her readers with a way to create healthy and manageable life. I greatly enjoyed this book as it helped me each day of the year and it gave me something I needed to do on a daily basis. I would say this book is great New Year’s resolution book to start with or starting anew and changing one’s life at any time of the year. Blumenthal’s three basic rules of her 52 week plan is:

1. “One Big Change Takes Many Small Changes

2. Extremes Don’t Work

3. Small Changes Feed Our Need to Succeed.” Blumenthal, 52 Small Changes.

For example the first week the topic is about drinking more water and fulfilling that goal through the entire week. Blumenthal tackles other issues such getting the right amount of sleep, improving food options, taking time out for yourself and more. This book was well-written and easy to read. I feel that if you want to skip around in the book and tackle issues that bother you the most, I think that would be fine to do. The author encourages the reader to break down their big goals into manageable levels that can easily be handled. This book is also perfect for anyone who struggles with completing goals and this book tackles an issue each week. Even if you stop using the book for whatever reason you can still start the book back up easily.

Book: 100 Ways to Build Self-Esteem and Teach Values

Author: Diane Loomans, Foreword: Jack Canfield, Contributor: Julia Loomans

This book is written by a mother and daughter team – Diane and Julia Loomans. This book has over 100 ideas, and techniques to help day-by-day family interactions more joyful and enjoyable too. This book is great for the entire family and even those without children. The book provides a pull-out portion of quotes that I put up in my room so that I could see it every time I passed by. I can read the quotes whenever I wanted some encouragement or a pick-me-up. I also wrote down the notes from the book as there was so much I learned and I have continued to re-read the book for further encouragement. My self-esteem has been fine but it’s nice to build it up anyway when there are times when I’m not feeling all that great emotionally. I know this book is perfect for parents who are looking to raise children with good self-esteem. This book is to easy to read and straight forward. Jack Canfield wrote the foreword of the book and mentioned this book provides an encyclopedia of helpful informational insights and useful ideas for ways on how to create “more love and less fear, more joy and less pain, and more achievement and less failure in people of all ages.” 100 Ways to Build to Build Self-Esteem and Teach Values. I have referred this book to others with kids and they found this book very helpful and useful.

Reference: http://www.amazon.com/Build-Self-Esteem-Values-Loomans-ebook/dp/B004LKRG98/ref=cm_cr_pr_product_top

How to Be Happy, Dammit: A Cynic’s Guide to Spiritual Happiness by Karen Salmansohn

I read this book several years ago and I found it to be absolutely amazing and inspirational. This book was exactly what I needed at that time. This book merges several different ideals such as psychology, biology along with quantum physics, eastern and western philosophies. All of the life lessons helped me out heavily and made me think about my life more including my relationships with my family, friends, my work friends, and myself. This book helped to improve my moods and made my days brighter and more enjoyable. The author didn’t approach these principles like other self-help writers and gurus. She approached these principles in a raw and straight to the point method. The author also used common sense practices such as, “not taking advice from people who don’t have careers, or relationship advice from people who don’t have relationships.” However, I don’t agree with what she said as there are some people who can “teach better than they can do.” I believe there are exceptions to some of these things and depends on the circumstances and backgrounds. The book is inexpensive and it was a quick read. I liked the graphics in the book and it was enjoyable to read. I know these days self-help books get a bad rap but there are some great self-help books out there such as this book. I would recommend this book to anyone looking for a little guidance in their lives and have a desire to learn and grow. This book changed the way I saw things and has provided me with a much brighter future.

Reference: http://www.amazon.com/How-Happy-Dammit-Spiritual-Happiness/dp/1587611198/ref=cm_cr-mr-title

Discardia: More Life, Less Stuff

Not what I was looking for, but a pretty good book for newbies

I'm in the awkward position of not really caring for or enjoying a book that objectively is pretty great. Part of the problem is that I have a semi-secret fondness for reading self help books from the "life improvement" and productivity enhancing end of the scale. If you have read most of the classics in this genre (books like It's All Too Much, Getting Things Done, and Your Money Or Your Life) you probably will not find very much new content here. I also felt like the book often veered away from the goal of "getting rid of stuff" and into the usual tips and tricks.

But is that a bad thing? These books are classics because they have great advice. And Dinah Sanders has distilled these books down to their most useful essence, saving you the sometimes-exasperating experience of wading through books that are 10% "one good idea," and 90% "expanding upon that one good idea." For those who have not read the entire panoply of this sort of self-help book, Discardia is practically a library in and of itself.

As for myself, I was hoping for more inspiration and help with getting rid of stuff - not just physical stuff, but all of it. Relief from the incessant "busy-ness" that is slowly but steadily corroding our quality of life. I was excited by the idea of a Discardia holiday four times a year, one at each solstice and equinox.

Ironically, the actual Discardia holidays seem to suffer from an overabundance of ideas. This is where the book could have most used being trimmed down to a single, clear, concise slogan. Instead we have collections of bullet points for each Discardia, where the hopelessly overwhelmed (like myself) might prefer something simpler to grasp. More clarity of purpose, if you will.

There are a lot of things to like about Discardia. I very much appreciate the way that Sanders never talks down to the audience, or gets too sentimental and sappy. The language is clear, frank, and honest. And even though I felt like I had read most of it before, I encountered a phrase that made me laugh with recognition. "Stasis chamber." Yes, I realized that I have several of those around my home, and it inspired me to go on a big decluttering binge the very next day.

If you need help letting go of things - and don't we all? - this is probably a good book to read along the way. Maybe it's just that I need graduate-level assistance, having plowed through all the undergrad texts already. Isn't that a depressing thought? Let us not speak of it any further.

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